Domestic violence is more common than most people realize. In California, nearly 35% of women and 31% of men experience some form of domestic violence in their lifetimes. Nationwide, about 10 million adults are affected every year. Those numbers are hard to ignore.
What makes domestic violence so hard to spot is that it goes far beyond physical harm. Many people do not know they are in an abusive relationship because they think abuse only counts if someone hits them. That is not true. California law defines domestic violence broadly, and it covers a wide range of behaviors that many people would not immediately recognize as abuse.
This post breaks down what California considers domestic violence, the different types of abuse, who the law protects, and what legal options are available if you are experiencing it.
How California Defines Domestic Violence
Under California Penal Code 13700(b), domestic violence is defined as abuse committed against a spouse, former spouse, cohabitant, former cohabitant, or a person with whom the suspect has had a child or is having or has had a dating or engagement relationship.
The law defines abuse under Penal Code 13700(a) as intentionally or recklessly causing or attempting to cause bodily injury, or placing another person in reasonable fear of imminent serious bodily injury to themselves or someone else.
The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence describes it as a pattern of behavior used by one intimate partner to gain power and control over another through physical assault, sexual assault, threats, and other abusive conduct.
In short, abuse does not have to leave a visible mark to count under California law.
Who Does the Law Protect?
California’s domestic violence laws apply to people in specific types of relationships. These are called qualifying domestic relationships, and they include:
- Married couples or people who were previously married
- People who live together or used to live together
- People who are dating, were dating, or are engaged or were engaged
- People who share a child together
When two people live together but are not in a romantic relationship, courts look at several factors to decide if the law applies. Those factors include whether the people share income or expenses, whether they jointly own or use property, and how long they have lived together.
The Different Types of Domestic Violence
Domestic violence takes many forms. Some are easy to see. Others are not. Here is a breakdown of the types California law recognizes.
Physical Abuse
This is the most well-known form of domestic violence. It involves any intentional use of force against another person. Common examples include hitting, pushing, slapping, shoving, biting, burning, and stabbing. Sexual assault and rape can also fall under physical abuse in the context of a domestic relationship.
The severity can range widely from case to case. That range does not change whether something counts as abuse under the law.
Verbal and Emotional Abuse
Verbal abuse includes harassment, threats, bullying, and excessive phone calls or electronic messages. It can also involve using a third party to deliver abusive messages on behalf of the abuser.
Emotional abuse is harder to identify, but California has actually written it into the Family Code. The law describes emotional abuse as conduct that disturbs the peace of another person, meaning it destroys their mental or emotional calm. This can happen in person, over the phone, through text messages, or through any online platform.
One specific form of emotional abuse is gaslighting. This is when an abuser distorts reality through their words or actions to confuse the victim and make them question their own memory or judgment. Over time, this kind of abuse can seriously damage a person’s self-esteem and overall sense of well-being.
Financial Abuse
Financial abuse is one of the most overlooked forms of domestic violence. In fact, research suggests that nearly 99% of all domestic abuse cases involve some element of financial abuse. More than half of survivors report incurring over $10,000 per year in coerced or fraudulent debt.
California law officially added financial abuse to its definition of domestic violence on January 1, 2022. It falls under what the California Family Code calls coercive control, which is defined as a pattern of behavior that unreasonably interferes with a person’s free will and personal liberty.
Under this definition, financial abuse includes controlling, regulating, or monitoring a partner’s finances, economic resources, or access to services. Some specific examples include:
- Removing a partner’s name from a joint bank or credit account
- Canceling access to health insurance
- Stopping automatic payments for essential bills or services
- Transferring money out of a joint account to harm the other person
- Controlling how much money a partner can access within the relationship
Money is a powerful tool. When one person controls all of it, the other person can feel trapped and unable to leave, which is exactly how financial abuse works.
Isolation
Isolating a victim is another form of control. An abusive partner may cut off contact with the victim’s family and friends, monitor who they talk to, or prevent them from leaving the home. The goal is to make the victim feel alone and dependent on the abuser.
Stalking
Stalking is considered a severe form of psychological and emotional abuse. It involves the persistent and unwanted pursuit of another person. Stalking can happen during a relationship or after it ends. Women are frequently targeted, though men can be victims too. It can involve showing up at someone’s home or workplace, repeated phone calls or messages, or monitoring someone’s online activity.
Coercive Control in California
California’s Family Code added coercive control to its list of recognized abuse in recent years. Coercive control is not one single act. It is a pattern. It can include controlling a partner’s daily routine, monitoring their movements or communications, isolating them from people they trust, or interfering with their finances.
The fact that financial abuse is now codified under coercive control is significant. It means a victim does not have to prove physical harm to qualify for legal protection in California. Controlling someone’s money, canceling their insurance, or blocking their access to funds can be enough to seek a restraining order.
Domestic Violence Crimes in California
California domestic violence crimes include battery, abuse, threats, and neglect. Some of these are charged as misdemeanors and some as felonies, depending on the severity of the conduct, the defendant’s criminal record, and the specific circumstances of the case. Some crimes can be charged either way.
When two people are in a qualifying domestic relationship, the law treats the offense more seriously than it would for a conflict between strangers.
Risk Factors That Can Lead to Abusive Behavior
There is no single explanation for why someone becomes abusive. Research points to several risk factors that can increase the likelihood:
- Anger management problems
- Low self-esteem
- Jealousy or possessiveness
- Personality disorders
- Alcohol or drug abuse
- Growing up in an abusive household or witnessing abuse as a child
These factors do not excuse abuse. There is no excuse for it. But understanding what drives abusive behavior can help explain the patterns that victims often experience in a relationship.
How Domestic Violence Affects Divorce in California
If you are going through a divorce and domestic violence is part of the picture, it can affect almost every part of your case.
California is a community property state, which means everything earned or acquired during a marriage is generally split equally in a divorce. But a finding of domestic violence can change that math significantly.
Spousal Support
When a court makes a finding of domestic violence, it must consider that finding when deciding on spousal support. If the abusive spouse is the one who would normally receive support, that finding could reduce the amount ordered or the length of time it is paid. If the abuse led to a criminal conviction, California law prohibits awarding spousal support to the convicted abuser.
Child Custody and Visitation
A finding of domestic violence triggers an automatic legal presumption that awarding sole or joint custody to the abusive party would harm the child. This applies even if the abuse never directly involved the children.
Division of Property
If domestic violence results in a criminal conviction, California law entitles the abused spouse to 100% of the community property interest in the abuser’s retirement and pension benefits.
Attorney Fees
If a protected party wins a restraining order, the court must order the restrained party to pay the protected party’s attorney fees and costs.
Firearms
A person who has a restraining order against them is legally prohibited from owning, possessing, purchasing, or receiving a firearm or ammunition while that order is in effect.
Applying for a Domestic Violence Restraining Order
If you are being abused and need immediate protection, you can apply for a Domestic Violence Temporary Restraining Order (DVTRO). These are typically granted on an ex parte basis, meaning the court can grant the order without first hearing from the other side.
Once a temporary order is granted, the court schedules a hearing, usually within three weeks, to decide whether to make the order permanent. Permanent restraining orders in California can last up to five years.
A restraining order can include several types of relief. Standard protections include:
- A stay-away order requiring the restrained person to stay at least 100 yards from you, your home, your vehicle, your workplace, and your children’s school
- A no-contact order preventing any direct or indirect contact
- An order removing the restrained party from a shared home
For victims of financial abuse specifically, a restraining order can also include:
- Granting exclusive use and control of shared property
- An order preventing any changes to health insurance or other insurance policies
- A property restraint stopping the abuser from transferring, selling, hiding, or borrowing against shared assets
- An order requiring the abuser to keep paying certain bills or debts
What to Do If You Think You Are Being Abused
If something feels wrong in your relationship, trust that feeling. Abuse rarely starts with the most obvious signs. It often builds slowly over time, through small acts of control, criticism, and isolation that can be hard to name at first.
Some people do not realize they have been experiencing financial abuse until they try to leave and find out they have no access to money, no credit in their name, or thousands of dollars of debt they did not know about. That is by design.
The first step is recognizing what is happening. The second step is getting help. That might mean reaching out to a trusted person in your life, calling a domestic violence hotline, or speaking with a family law attorney who understands what California law says and how to use it to protect you.
Talk to a Family Law Attorney Today
Domestic violence in California covers physical abuse, emotional abuse, verbal abuse, financial abuse, isolation, and stalking. The law recognizes all of these as serious, and it gives victims real tools to protect themselves and their families.
If you are in an abusive relationship and considering divorce, or if you just want to understand your options, speaking with a family law attorney is a good place to start. Domestic violence cases touch on custody, support, property division, and restraining orders, and getting the right legal guidance matters.
Griffith Young is here to help. Call us today at 858-345-1720 to schedule a consultation and learn about the legal options available to you under California law.